Archive for April, 2010


If you loved me you’d buy me this: shiny silver chest edition

April 30, 2010

Oh come on… really? Who could look at this and not have it scream EMILY!!!!!? It’s as if it’s shiny silver curviness was fabricated just to delight my senses.


When it’s time for me to do my next apartment it might be hard for me to resist the the call of shiny things. But I will have to, because Dreamboat is not likely to share my love of girly fabulous design. 🙂


Urban Legend: fish are calming

April 29, 2010

Whoever thought fish were supposed to be a calming influence clearly have not walked a mile in my shoes.

Last year I got The Child a beautiful betta fish – a blue one, of course, due to her obsession with the color blue. We named him Aqua (very original, I know, so kindly STFU). He started off to be a nice enough little chap. He’d follow you around the tank, seemingly in to “hanging out” and interacting.

Then we moved. And his food got lost in the shuffle.

Dreamboat (Scott, for those of you out of the loop) babysat him for a week or so and tried to give him the flake food he feeds his oscar. Aqua was not amused. He went on a hunger strike.

When we brought him to our house we picked up some betta food, thinking he’d go back to his happy, eating, interacting self. FAIL. He’d suck in a little nugget and immediately spit it out and look at me like I was the biggest jackass on the planet.

I don’t take kindly to being rebuffed by surly fish. It was expensive betta food and he damn well better learn to love it!

He finally relented, though I think his prolonged starvation has taken its toll. Either he’s developed a vision problem or he’s manipulating me. I have a strong suspicion it’s the latter. Now he hangs out in the upper corner of his tank (his “feed me” spot), and when I drop a little nugget in the water he does one of two frustrating things: he’ll flee as if I’m showering him with lighting bolts; or he hovers within millimeters of the floating tidbit until I wiggle it even closer to him with my finger – literally forcing me to spoon feed him. He may eat one or four nuggets before he decides, again, that it’s no longer food – it’s lightning bolts.

High maintenence little bastard.

When Dreamboat asked if he could put his koi in the fountain in our garden I thought that was a nifty idea! Koi! They are cool and all zen-ny just by virtue of their folkloric (is that a word?) reputation.

When he dumped them in the fountain I was excited as they were big and beautiful! There’s one gray and white one that reminds me of some prehistoric monster-skeleton-y thing; and two orange, black and white ones that are just plain pretty.

The process of capturing them from their large pond, spending a whole day in a bucket in the car, and getting unceremoniously dumped in to our admittedly scuzzy fountain was an understandably stressful day for them. I spent lots of time that day worrying that they were too stressed. Was the gray one listing to one side? Were the spotted ones even moving?? Already I was investing too much emotion in three fish, but being an animal lover I am terrified of anything dying on my watch.

Eventually they perked up and deemed sufficiently strong ( in my expert opinion) for me to quit worrying. (Except for worrying that one of the neighborhood raccoons would make sushi of them – but that’s nature so I can deal with it. Kind of.)

Excitedly I decided it was time to feed them. OMG have you seen big hotels with koi fish and how they practically leap out of the water to gobble up their vittles? These fish are flashy show-offs who dazzle you with their food-guzzling bravado! And now I was going to have that spectacular-ness in my own back yard! Perhaps I should sell tickets!!


Why? Because now these are “my” fish. And apparently my fish all have eating disorders. And my koi fish also are all Emo. Seeing them in our rather small fountain is like seeing Sasquatch. The three of them spend all their time hiding under the fountain because the world is clearly too sad for them to be in and my love is just not enough.

... because the other two little bastards are hiding

(No they are not yet raccoon sushi. When I turn on the water pump they are forced out of their mopey-hidey place and I can see that their sorry asses are still alive.)

So, in summary, fish are supposed to be all relaxing but my fish make me angry.




April 22, 2010

After two days of rain and wind, the sun finally decided to come back out in San Francisco. I headed to the barn bright and early (well, 10 a.m. – about as bright and early as I can muster these days) for some quality equine time.

Two days of sitting in a stall is not in Fiona’s nature. Standing still or walking quietly is also not in her nature. After some maniacal tearing around in the arena we headed out for a short and sweet frantic trail ride. I did get her to stand for a brief moment – long enough for Susan to snap a pic that would give one the impression that Fiona is a relaxed ride 🙂

Even after a good gallop – good for both our hearts and minds – she still had a full tank of gas. *sigh* Maybe tomorrow I’ll actually be able to wear her out.

Now I’m off to shop for some pony sedatives!


Choreographed disarray… swoon!

April 20, 2010

Jonathan Adler, oh how I love you.

Choreographed disarray, throw pillows are Prozac… your witty little nuggets of decorating wisdom make my heart sing! Anti-depressive Living is for me!

Oh, and be so very jealous… this is 4 blocks from my house. I like to stand in front of the windows and drool daydream. Sometimes I even lick the glass imagine owning most everything inside.


Changes are afoot

April 19, 2010

If you know me at all you know that I love me some mani-pedi action. Fake nails are not my bag – I prefer them short and shiny. But I’m also not very adventurous when it comes to color. If it’s not OPI “Kinky in Helsinki” or “I’m Not Really a Waitress”, I probably haven’t worn it. I’m a creature of red, sparkly habit.

Habit hasn’t served me too well – especially in the last year. Big, often uncomfortable, gestures seem to be what’s needed of late. This evenings’ color selection was deigned by the universe.

Baby steps … I’m takin’ em.



April 19, 2010

There is something about The City that keeps pulling me back. Perhaps this is where I belong, or more likely where I was, was not.

For the immediate future The Child and I are nestled snugly in the loving embrace of Pacific Heights. It has been not only a return home but a return to sanity, to a time-tested (and mother approved!) support network, to prospects, and to positivity.

Sometimes you make decisions without having all the information. Sometimes it works out, and other times you find it was a mistake. Righting the wrong can be painful and leave you scarred, but sometimes it’s necessary. The reward for endurance can be a thousandfold the price. You can’t remain in a void and progress.

So I chose life. I chose a future, which is turning out to be more than I ever would imagined.

I have friends…

Fiona has friends…

And I have love… lots of it.

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