Archive for the ‘Apartment Therapy’ Category

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Such busy little bees we were

January 31, 2011

Ok, all y’all know that decorating is just about my most favorite hobby in the world. Moving in to this house has been a very long process… more settling in than decorating. This weekend we finally got around to some PROJECTS – YAY!!

A big fat gigantic THANK YOU goes out to The Man for being a perfect project partner! He helped when I asked, did an amazing job, and steered clear when I was acting a total maniacal bitch not so pleasantly.

First up… The Man and his friend finally got rid of the God-awful, non-functioning light fixtures over the fireplace. They are much more appropriate to the house and cast a lovely light, if I do say so myself!

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If you loved me you’d buy me this: proof that I am a trendsetter pillow edition

January 19, 2011

Well lookie here… guess who was ahead of color trend AGAIN.

That’s right – my idol Jonathan Adler has put out GREEN AND GRAY. Yeah, I totally beat him to the punch.

If you have been following me for a while you will remember that I also called the turquoise and orange trend way before the stores.

That’s right, bitchesss, I am totally badass like that.

p.s. BUY ME THOSE PILLOWS! 😀

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Christmas decoration inspiration

November 28, 2010

Every year we choose a theme for our Christmas decorations: red/green, blue/silver, sports, more is more, etc. This year I am finding that the style of our house is giving me decorator’s block. Hopefully some of these ideas will help me break free from the Craftsman confines 😀

Since I can’t have snow and barren wintry landscapes here in the temperate land of evergreens.

Playing with scale!

Um, helloooooo? SHINY!!! aaaacccckkkkk!

I am oddly attracted to this modern meets country look.
I need to ponder that for a hot minute…
nope… the word ‘country’ still gives me the dry heaves

(pssst… notice the light fixture!)

What says CHRISTMAS!!! more than shiny, hanging balls?

More is more, especially when it comes to twinkling things!

Ok, so let’s recap. What have we learned here?

  1. I like modern
  2. I like MORE
  3. I like sparkly, twinkly, shiny things

Groundbreaking stuff here, I know.

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Submitting to retail therapy – against my will

November 19, 2010

Shopping, oh how I hate thee! Let me count the ways!

I am sitting here in a completely empty office in the dark save for the one light in my cube. The only sound is the soft whirrrrr of my computer fan and the HVAC. It is very calm and peaceful and I kind of wish it were like this all the time.

To add to my morning zen I actually put 2 minutes of thought in to my outfit. I am accessorized. I’m having a good hair day. I even managed to put on perfume! (Yes, Rae, the French whore perfume)

And, thanks to The Man who insisted, I have $300 cash waiting patiently in my wallet for a shopping trip this afternoon.

Cue anxiety attack!

Seriously. My stomach is in knots at just the thought of stepping foot in stores and – even worse – trying on clothes.

But as I admitted to The Man as he was delivering me to the front door of my office, I’ll never improve my self image if I’m always feeling like I am wearing sausage casings.

My wardrobe has become incredibly limited and I have stubbornly refused to buy fat clothes. I am cheap and I don’t want to admit I’m not a size 6… 8…. or 10 *ACK!!!* any more.  It’s hard to get out from under the wet blanket of self-loathing when there’s nothing you can put on to make you feel good about yourself.

So I am going to do that thing that I hate most in life… I am going to shop. My strategy is this:  a few multi-use pieces, mostly in black, with lots of colorful accessories. Hopefully I’ll soon be able to ditch the fat clothes and I’ll still have a lot of cute accessories. Then I will go home and purge my closet of all but a few things that don’t fit. No more reminders of what size I was.

Wish me luck.

Oh… on a happy note here is another smidgeon of  progress on the home front.

You may remember this picture from the first day we were in our house. We took a LOT of crap on Facebook for our sexy TV stand (and blow up mattress and cardboard dining table) even though our real furniture wouldn’t arrive for a few more days.

Confession:  that was still our TV stand until last weekend. Actually it was another tote higher! HAHA

That’s fixed now with a much more practical solution…

p.s. I got another 10 straws done last night! At this rate I may have a lamp shade before the world ends in December of 2012!

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Pick one, because clearly I am insane.

November 18, 2010

I want to redo my dining room chair seat cushions. Clearly I want green. I have narrowed it down to the following…

#1

#2

#3

#4

#5

All of these will be a huge contrast against the chairs – which I am redoing a la this black chair. Wicker painted in gloss black = HolyEffingFabulous!! (And OMG that room RULES!)

Tell me in the comments which one you like best!

Don’t make me shame you lurkers for your lack of participation!

You know who you are! And I know who you are!

😛

Now on the topic of crazy… If I ever could lay claim to even a shred of sanity I can no longer. I have undertaken the Grand Daddy of All Ridiculously Time Intensive Projects.

The bare bulb on the sun porch just cannot remain naked. Nooooooo. I could just go buy a shade, right? Again, nooooooo. Why? Because the shade I want costs $10,000. That’s right – $10k!

Me being the cheapest of all frugal, purse clutching, bargain shopping, penny-pinching sorts is determined to recreate the look of said shade for the princely sum of $4.50. Of course that does not take in to account the 12+ hours of freakishly tedious labor it will take for me to complete this project.

The major material used is drinking straws – and cutting them in to about a gazillion pieces.

So I got about 6 done in an hour. A box of straws has 100 straws in it.

Think I’ll ever finish it? Shall we start a pool?? Or should I just “do not pass GO, go straight to loony bin”?

Again, pick one.

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Holy Mary, Mother of Productivity!

November 16, 2010

I think I set some sort of record for weeknight productivity last night!

This, if you remember, is where I started in the dining room…

I started in the opposite corner and cleared one small space. We hadn’t seen this corner since the day we moved in.

But clearing one space means destroying another.

I was feeling rather down about that when my friend Patty pointed out “It’s Newton’s 3rd law of house cleaning: “For every clean and organized anything, there is an equal and opposite mess to make it happen.”

So I pressed on…

I ended up with 5 bags of trash and a tower of recycling.

And a TON of donations.

The result?

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Sage words from my domestic mentor, Jonathan Adler

November 10, 2010

I am currently experiencing a sadness with my house. It’s so beautiful and perfect and wonderful and lovely – but it’s not making me happy. There are still boxes unpacked. There are no pictures on the walls. Nothing new and pretty has been purchased just for it.

It seems to be a reflection of my self-image struggles of late.

Then this morning my idol for all things happy and fabulous around the house, Jonathan Adler, had some words I needed to hear – yet again.
 

Our 10 Commandments for a Happy Chic home

1.  Thou shalt embrace maximalism.
Thou wilt find minimalism to be something of a bummer in thy abode. Thou wilt grow tired of an endless sea of beige and thou wilt long for a splash of color & a dollop of pattern! Bargello pillows, Furnace bottles, and rustic modern lamps – these shalt be the accessories that add some panache to your pad.

2.  Thou shalt not deny thyself hotelish comfort at home.
Thou shalt furnish thy rooms with paw-pampering, hand-loomed llama wool rugs, luxurious lighting and our fabulous furniture.
Thy rooms shalt feel like the most opulent hotel rooms in which thou hast ever stayed.
Thou art worth it.

3.  Thou shalt buy an X-Bench.
Then, thou shalt buy another. Thou shalt use them in pairs, perfect under thy console or placed near thy sofa. Thou shalt rest thy feet upon them & so will thy guests. In fact, thy guests might even fight over who gets to rest upon them. Therefore, thou shalt establish house rules about thy X-Benches. Perhaps thou should consider a sign up sheet.

4.  If thy nest needeth zest, consider thy crest!
Thou shalt emblazon with thine initials wherever possible.

5.  Thou shalt mix fancy with frisky.
Thou shalt not be overly formal, for if thou art, thou will be sad. Conversely, thou shalt not be overly whimsical, for if thou art thou will not feel chic. Therefore, thou shalt embrace a mix, pairing the chic classical foundation – excellent proportions, classic furniture – with a layer of playful punctuation. Then thou shalt rest.

6.  Thou shalt honor the funsters of yore.
David Hicks, Alexander Girard, Piero Fornasetti, Bonnie Cashin, Bjorn Wiinblad – if thou dost not knoweth them, thou should. Thou can use Google Images to learn more about them and thou shalt channel their fun, idiosyncratic, playful spirit in thine own interiors. Thy home will be fun, happy, and chic.

7.  Thou shalt not commit murder,
…unless thou art murdering for a decorative accessory.
If thou should find thyself at one of our stores and seeth the last bird bowl on our shelf, thou shalt feel free to use whatever means necessary to obtain that special something.

8.  Thou shalt not be afraid of orange.
Thou shalt use orange copiously in thy interior, whether it beeth in an orange breakfast room or via the zing of an orange lacquered box. Thou might even consider painting thy front door orange to pique thy neighbor’s curiosity. Thou shalt also covet chocolate brown.

9.  Thou shalt play ping pong.
Better still, thou shalt have a ping pong table in thy living room. Then, lo, thou shalt play ping pong with thy spouse rather than sitting around watching thy tv.

10.  Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s house.
In fact, after following these 10 commandments, thy neighbor might covet thy house. So there.

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